"My son and I have allergy-like issues and are sensitive to outgassing, so something that does not create smoking paint or smoke into the room, fumes, odors, etc., would be very important."
" wood seems to put out a less toxic smoke (at least if done right) from the pov of allergies and chemical intolerances than other combustible fuels--including pellets. -While inside an area heated with a pellet stove has sometimes seemed okay, (though not always) the outside has often seemed very polluted by them, esp. in this area where smoke tends to hang around and not rise up and blow away. Even the pellets themselves as they are when being stored seem sort of toxic/outgassy sort of like particleboard is."
I personally have three friends who will not have a wood stove inside the house secondary to allergy issues. One person had and used a wood stove and had to get rid of it because of allergies. Another friend's allergy doctor told her flat out that she'd spend any money she saved with a wood stove in his office getting her allergies treated. A third person is not allergic to the burning wood itself but he is allergic to the dust generated by the ash, enough that he cannot use a wood stove in the house. His family heats with a outdoor wood boiler.
If you and your son have allergies that are triggered by wood products outgassing, then burning wood in any form could be a problem.
I could be wrong, but it was my understanding that pellet stoves are more efficient burners than cord wood burning stoves, and thus produced less particulate emissions.
An EPA rated stove will produce less emissions overall, if this is one of your criteria.
All stoves will go through a heat induced finish curing on the first few burns.
If particulate emissions and allergies are a factor for you, perhaps you could consider a gas stove that can be run on propane or natural gas, if that's available in your area. Alternately, your fireplace could be converted to a gas fireplace with gas logs. These gas appliances could be used during a power outage. I don't know about cooking on them (never tried, never investigated it) but perhaps it's possible, I don't know.