Craigslist laugh of the day.....

[weatherguy]

I shouldn't put this one out there in case someone else beats me to it

(broken link removed to http://worcester.craigslist.org/zip/4121915618.html)

 

[BillLion]

I shouldn't put this one out there in case someone else beats me to it

(broken link removed to http://worcester.craigslist.org/zip/4121915618.html)

I'm typing this as I'm driving to pick up right now...

 

[hockeypuck]

Do you think there is a "stupid" subculture that actually trades this stuff? Kind of like the Bilderberg group, but for the stupids....

 

[BoilerMan]

I was just thinking how RICH I am, wood that is split and stacked, imagine what I could trade for that.........a pond dug..........NAH.......I'd want a lake, stocked too!

TS

 

[Jon1270]

Just found my favorite so far:

Firewood BLACK LOCUST (Bellevue)
I will soon have 6 (+) cords of Black Locust firewood for sale. (FYI: Black Locust has 23% MORE heating value than even White Oak which is some of THE best firewood available.)

Deal #1; With the "average" firewood (trees of less heat value than even White Oak) now selling for $150.00 per cord. . .I am willing to sell these 6 cords for the same $150.00 price. When you consider that a full cord of White Oak firewood sells for over $200.00 per cord and the heat value of my Black Locust being 23% MORE than White Oak. . .you are saving over $600.00 ! That's like getting your "average" firewood for only $50.00 per cord. The added bonus is, "You will also have to fuel up your wood stove less AND. . .have fewer ashes to dump too!"

Deal #2; If you are willing to do the work of cutting down these (3), 23" diameter (at chest height) I will sell you all of them for only $700.00. That means you save ANOTHER $200.00. On top of the saving from "Deal #1" you are now saving a grand total of $800.00 or. . .it's like getting the "average" firewood for $27.00 per cord! Thee added bonuses of Deal #2 is; you'll fuel up your wood stove less, have fewer ashes to dump AND. . ..you can take every little branch you want so you get even MORE Black Locust firewood! Now. . .it gets even better. . ..these 3 trees have super-easy access, are right beside a paved parking lot, are up close to the road AND (!) I'm NOT going to be very picky about the mess you leave

Seriously folks. . ...it doesn't get any easier or more cost effective than this AND. . .you may never ever. . .see something like this again.

You go ahead and check out the heating values as I did, sharpen your chain saw, contact me with your telephone number, come and take a look and then just give me the cash.

PLEASE include your telephone number with your reply as this will ONLY be on a 1st come - 1st serve basis.

Ps. I will not take my ad down until the cold hard cash is in my paw so. . .bring it on and help yourself to the ABSOLUTE BEST firewood deal anywhere!

Thanks,
Paul

 

[lazeedan]

Bah haha. Really I can pay to cut their tree. Sign me up!

 

[PDXpyro]

This ad has been repeatedly posted. I can't imagine why no one has hopped on it, lol.

(broken link removed to http://pittsburgh.craigslist.org/zip/3979743200.html)
free firewood (monessen pa )

i have a few trees in my back yard i need cut down and you can have the wood the problem is one tree is leaning on my garage roof and the others are against my fence you will need to cut down without damaging any thing if interrested call me 724 684 4780

• Location: monessen pa
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Posting ID: 3979743200

Posted: 2013-08-04, 9:22AM EDT

Updated: 2013-08-25, 7:26PM EDT

(broken link removed to https://accounts.craigslist.org/eaf?postingID=3979743200&token=U2FsdGVkX18yMjIwNTIyMtduia9ErQyWc3nzoKAcFfXRTtvRL6G21bw7r-qgNRLMI1LrQo-Ave9LefamAf_9OrFPU4_oyPH4)

 

[PDXpyro]

This ad has been repeatedly posted. I can't imagine why no one has hopped on it, lol.

(broken link removed to http://pittsburgh.craigslist.org/zip/3979743200.html)
free firewood (monessen pa )

i have a few trees in my back yard i need cut down and you can have the wood the problem is one tree is leaning on my garage roof and the others are against my fence you will need to cut down without damaging any thing if interrested call me 724 684 4780

• Location: monessen pa
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Posting ID: 3979743200

Posted: 2013-08-04, 9:22AM EDT

Updated: 2013-08-25, 7:26PM EDT

(broken link removed to https://accounts.craigslist.org/eaf?postingID=3979743200&token=U2FsdGVkX18yMjIwNTIyMtduia9ErQyWc3nzoKAcFfXRTtvRL6G21bw7r-qgNRLMI1LrQo-Ave9LefamAf_9OrFPU4_oyPH4)

It's really too bad that it's NOT ok to contact that poster with services or other commercial interests: I'd like to offer professional, paid counseling on the relative values of "firewood" vs. "skilled labor" in cases such as this.

 

[Jon1270]

Heh, and now we've got this:

JUNK FREE FILL AN FREE TREES (CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF)
I AS A FEMALE AM SICK OF THESE ADS FOR RUBBISH FOR FREE ! IF I AS A WOMAN CAN CUT UP TREES WITH A CHAIN SAW AND IF I DIG UP AN AREA TO PUT A WALL IN AND HAVE LEFT OVER DIRT I ALWAYS FIND A PLACE TO PUT IT.SAD THAT THE MEN TODAY CAN'T OR ARE JUST TO LAZY TO CLEAN UP THEIR MESS THEY WANT SOME ONE TO COME AND DO IT FOR FREE.GET YOUR WIVES OUT THERE TO DO IT FOR YOU OR JUST LIVE WITH YOUR MESS.CALL FOR A DUMPSTER AND PAY FOR IT OR ARE YOU TOO CHEAP ALSO.PULL UP YOUR BIG BOY PANTS AND DO THE WORK YOURSELF OR PUT THE WIFES BIG GIRL PANTS AND HAVE HER DO IT.NOBODY WANTS YOUR JUNK! NO ROTTED WOOD,OR JUNK TIRES NOBODY WANTS THEM! TAKE YOUR TIRES TO A REPAIR GARAGE AND PAY TO GET RID OF THEM AS I DO.

• Location: CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

 

[Bster13]

WOW... actually nice:

the best of the best free firewood (lake grove)
heres the deal ---you show up this morning with a truck or trailer at 6 commonwealth ave lake grove and my crew of 5 will load you by hand real nice pieces of oak and maple firewood nothing to big or awkward you take what you need-----if you have a stove that needs the wood to be cut a specific length than--just let us know we work fast--call joe for details! this is for this morning631-3270266

• Location: lake grove

 

[Bster13]

But only 25k:

(broken link removed to http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/for/4080698011.html)

Timber or Logs For Sale - $25000 (Sullivan County)
I have timber available or logs for sale, and asking for the timber bidding to start at 25,000, and if you wish to purchase without the biding process the price will be 35,000. Prefer (only) to do lump sum up front, cash due at signing. The logs on the ground (are mature) and ready to be cut into firewood.

On almost 40 acres, only eight trees per acre permitted cut. Your required to paid all fees, produce all permits, necessary documents inclusive of insurance and liability coverage and hauling and cleanup.

It's winter time again and I'm here to help for those of you who need firewood for your home.... The wind has blown down recently some hardwood trees that can be cut for firewood there. Buyer responsible for cleanup, pickup & hauling away at own expense ( 5,000 dollars for all fallen logs or best offer?)

*Note, firewood logs for sale on ground (mature) as much as you need. requirement- must pick up logs and haul away yourself. Amount for logs $5,000 . Contact; Mr. Ramon @ 1917.853.3020/845.557.6230

 

[rowerwet]

too bad I didn't live closer! those $5,000 trees must burn extra hot, $25,000 sounds like a real deal....

 

[BIGDADDY]

What is Costimize? The guy needs spell check desperately.

He can change the price, that's all costimize yea I think that's what he means.

 

[BIGDADDY]

There is a guy that had 2 big at least 70 feet spruce trees very close to his house and the road. He had a free tree sign on them for quite a while. One day I saw a tree service outfit taken it down from the top down.
He finally figured it out.

 

[weatherguy]

Someone should email some of these guys and tell them wood isn't firewood until it's cut and split which requires work.

 

[rowerwet]

♣▬TONS of seasoned firewood FREE NOW▬♣ (Laconia)
I had a little accident, but learned to never play a drinking game called flaming kabobs again. Now my house got all burned up, but can be a blessing for someone who needs good seasoned wood. There is some really good wood here, but you have to sift through the ashes to get it. I want it all gone by today, so come help yourselves.

This wood is definitely seasoned, as you can see (I have been told it is "kiln dried" whatever that means) and will burn real good for you. You can keep whatever interesting things you find when getting that good wood loaded. I have cold beers for after the job is done and know a few good drinking games. No kids please. You can bring some beers too, but no girlie stuff.
(broken link removed to http://nh.craigslist.org/zip/4127138077.html) so you guys can see the pictures....

 

[slayer7]

Someone should email some of these guys and tell them wood isn't firewood until it's cut and split which requires work.

This guy has had this ad on here for a few weeks now but someone finally gave him his comeuppance...

 

[BillLion]

This guy has had this ad on here for a few weeks now but someone finally gave him his comeuppance...



View attachment 114525
View attachment 114526

I think this is true anywhere but especially in our state where free firewood is super easy to come by. I've had 3 trees (sugar maple, red maple & chestnut oak) DELIVERED to me free in the last 6 weeks. If I had room, the would be no end in sight!

I love the person's response to the poster.

 

[chazcarr]

I think this is true anywhere but especially in our state where free firewood is super easy to come by. I've had 3 trees (sugar maple, red maple & chestnut oak) DELIVERED to me free in the last 6 weeks. If I had room, the would be no end in sight!

I love the person's response to the poster.

That is good for you! I have tried several times to get even a pine and have never gotten one tree delivered free.
Most people ask for gas money and then don't show.

 

[muncybob]

***WANTED*** free pine logs. I don't have a chain saw! (Williamsport will travel)


Huh???

 

[MDFisherman]

Downed Trees for Firewood (Gainesville, VA)
I have many downed trees from the storms over the last year or so. All would make great firewood. You clear the downed trees, you get the 2/3rd's of the wood. At least 20 to 30 cords available, all in a small area, accessible by truck. All trees are hardwood; Maple, Oak, etc. I'm not paying you to remove the trees. If you are a firewood dealer, or burn firewood, this is good free, easy to get to, downed trees that will make great firewood. All trees have come down recently, ... in the last 10 months.
To eliminate spammers, put "I want your trees" in the subject line of your email reply.
Also include your phone number and direct email in your reply. Please let me know if you are an individual or a firewood dealer. Both are welcome

• Location: Gainesville, VA
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

 

[BillLion]

That is good for you! I have tried several times to get even a pine and have never gotten one tree delivered free.
Most people ask for gas money and then don't show.

Maybe I should have been more specific to my area of the state.

CL has been good to me and just driving by and seeing trees being cut down has worked when I asked about where the wood was going.

Hope you catch some breaks soon!

 

[BillLion]

That is good for you! I have tried several times to get even a pine and have never gotten one tree delivered free.
Most people ask for gas money and then don't show.

Maybe I should have been more specific to my area of the state.

CL has been good to me and just driving by and seeing trees being cut down has worked when I asked about where the wood was going.

Hope you catch some breaks soon!

 

[chazcarr]

Maybe I should have been more specific to my area of the state.

CL has been good to me and just driving by and seeing trees being cut down has worked when I asked about where the wood was going.

Hope you catch some breaks soon!

Yes, I am my own worst enemy in the scrounging department. Don't let anyone know but I don't have a pick up and my trailer is not street legal.

 

[weatherguy]

Yes, I am my own worst enemy in the scrounging department. Don't let anyone know but I don't have a pick up and my trailer is not street legal.

That makes it a bit tougher, I remember a poster on here a few years back that would scrounge firewood and haul it home on his bicycle. I get most of mine by being quick on craigslist ads or when I see trees being cut down, I got 2 cords of sugar maple when I saw some guys cutting them in an apartment complex and just stopped and asked them if I could have it, they cut the wood into 4 foot sections and put it in nice neat piles for me.