Many stove owners are running their thermostats with bigger dead-bands than that. What differential are you running on your thermostat?
I run mine with a tight dead-band of 1 degree. The down side of that is that the number of start cycles increases as differential is made smaller. My igniter is now about two years old so I am comfortable with that trade-off.
Running in manual mode should reduce the number of cycles because of the tendency to overshoot the set-point. That overshoot also helps with the drop at auto-clean because more heat has been stored in the stove's body. I use that mode only in the coldest weather (like now) because I believe auto mode to be a little more efficient
As you say, everybody's situation is different
I run it with the set point temp around 78 so that I never reaches it, thus the room differential does not really matter unless it is very warm out. But I am running it on +2 I believe. I never overshoot the set-point when it is cold out.
I agree when its cold out running it in manual makes sense as it allows you to burn on the higher heat output longer and get closer to the temp you want before cutting it back so you do not reach that temp.