My stove is a bit oversized for my house. I'm still trying to perfect operating it so that it doesn't bake us out too.
Heating with wood won't give you nice even heat like a gas/oil furnace will, and rather involves wider temperature swings within the house.
You can control heat output a few different ways...
1) Burn in loads. Load up the stove, light it, and let it burn. Don't add a split or two here or there. Let the entire load burn down to coals, and let the stove start to cool some before reloading. Don't reload until you need to add more heat to the house. As you continue to operate your stove, you'll get a better feeling for what the temperature in the stove room needs to drop back to before you reload.
2) Vary the size of the loads according to what you need from the stove at that time. If you don't need a lot of heat, build a smaller fire. A smaller fire won't burn as long, and will put less heat into your house. If you pack the firebox full, you'll get a lot of heat, and a long burn. This might be OK for an overnight burn when the stove room won't be occupied. The higher temp will help the house coast through the night until you can reload in the morning. During the hours that you'll be in the stove room/kitchen, you'll want smaller fires.
3) Adjust the size of the splits that you're using. Another thing you'll get the hang of over time is how large/small to make your splits when you're processing or ordering your wood. It's hard to build a smaller fire if you only have large splits, and it's hard to get overnight burns if you have small splits.
4) Different types of wood will put out different amounts of heat. For instance, Oak, Black Locust, or Osage (to name a few) are pretty dense. They produce a lot of heat, and burn for a long time. Softwood like Pine burns hot, but burns quickly, and per load, will produce less total heat energy. There are many types of trees in between. With some trial and error over time, you might find that certain types of wood work best for you.
5) Quality fuel is also important. Unseasoned wood can cause two problems... on one hand, if you NEED lots of heat output, you wont get as much heat out of green wood as you do good dry wood. Some energy will be lost to boiling out the excess moisture in the wood. On the other hand, green wood also will make your stove harder to operate. You'll have to burn your stove hotter in order to keep it from smoldering so that it burns as cleanly as possible. It has been my experience that burning green wood reduces the total range over which you have control of the stoves output.
In the end, the answer will come back to experience. Different house designs, different stoves, and different chimney systems make each stove operate a little differently. Over time, you'll get used to how your system works. Even varying weather conditions can impact how your stove will operate from day to day.
Experiment with your stove and see how it does! It will probably take a couple seasons before you really get it down to a science.
-SF