# Guy pulls in my driveway, wants to buy wood



## bogydave (Nov 2, 2012)

This AM a guy pulled in the driveway wanting to buy my wood. He saw the seasoning stack out back.
Told him, not for sale & it's not ready to burn this year any way.
WELL: He huffed up:
"I'm from Oregon, I was a logger there. You don't need to season wood for 1 or 2 years for it to burn"
I said," I know, but my new EPA catalytic stove does" "I need that wood in 2 years, so it's not for sale"

After he left,
My next thought was, do I need to camouflage the wood stack 

Maybe I should've given him the "hearth.com/" forum site 
Let Dennis straighten him out LOL


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## NYLife (Nov 2, 2012)

You sure should. You have a lot of shady and sneaky people


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## fire_man (Nov 2, 2012)

Yea, with an attitude like his, I'd be worried about my wood, too. At least he asked, others have reported missing wood.


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## Backwoods Savage (Nov 2, 2012)

I can easily picture that Dave.   Wish I had been there.


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## Highbeam (Nov 2, 2012)

Do you think he is a first year alaskan? Waiting until November to acquire wood in that climate is crazy.


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## JOHN BOY (Nov 2, 2012)

I'd keep an eye out just to be on the safe side. People think its ok to steal , and that theres no accountability for there actions. Of course are g'vnt doesn't
help by not enforcing laws.


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## bogydave (Nov 2, 2012)

Highbeam said:


> Do you think he is a first year alaskan? Waiting until November to acquire wood in that climate is crazy.


 
Yea
I'd place him in the "*Cheechako:*" category


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## DexterDay (Nov 2, 2012)

I have had a couple people stop and ask me also. 

The one guy said "Its pretty obvious you sell wood. So why dont you have a sign out?". 

I told him, because I dont sell wood. He thought I had 10 yrs worth of wood. It was obvious that he only bought wood when he ran out and never seen what an entire yrs worth of wood looks like. Poor sap 

Having LotsofWood is Money in the Bank.

(Disclaimer: I do sell a couple cord a yr to Family/Selling really isn't the word I should use either  More like give)


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## PapaDave (Nov 2, 2012)

I'm just curious why he thinks being from Oregon and a logger makes him an expert on wood "seasoning" times?
I know how to make pb&j _*sammiches*_, but that doesn't mean I know how to make pb or j.
Ya' ever get the urge to just rear back and smack someone?
Play this  for him if he comes back.


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## StihlHead (Nov 2, 2012)

Logger from Orygun? Likely has a rather low IQ in my experience of living here. Ask him if he can sit in a chair and lift himself up by his own bootstraps.

Likely he has a smoke dragon stove and will burn wood he cut this spring and dried this summer. I see a lot of that type of burning here. Lots of smoke here, which is why they are forcing people to replace their stoves with EPA ones. Of course, they will still burn under-dried wood and defeat the purpose of the laws, so they will come up with EPA-III/WA approved stoves requirements, and they will still burn green wood in them, which will eventually lead to cat stoves being required, or banning wood burning altogether.

But of course, why do you have an EPA/cat stove in Alaska? You _could_ just burn one year seasoned wood... waiving my Stihl chainsaws under the computer screen here, "I am from Oregon, and yadda yadda yadda..."


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## Jack Straw (Nov 2, 2012)

This is why I enjoy living '800 from the road behind a line of evergreens.


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## Larry in OK (Nov 2, 2012)

Alaska is a big place, people go missing all the time...


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## wishlist (Nov 2, 2012)

bogydave said:


> Maybe I should've given him the "hearth.com/" forum site
> Let Dennis straighten him out LOL



If he's anything like a few of my neighbors who burn OWB's it wouldn't do any good Dave.  They cut on a as needed basis,  wood is never covered but man can they send up some smoke!


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## fossil (Nov 2, 2012)

I understand that some years back, before I moved here to Oregon, there was a statewide purge of undesirables based on CSQ (Common Sense Quotient).  All those with below acceptable CSQ were deported from Oregon.  Some went to Washington, some to Idaho, some to Nevada, and some to California.  I had heard that there were a few who chose not to settle right away, but to keep moving on in search of a new home.  Sounds to me as though at least one made it all the way to Alaska.  Of course, that program couldn't make a permanent change in the Oregon demographic, so today we're probably just about back where we were before that effort was made...at least if my day-to-day observations are any indication.  If anything, encourage him to continue north.    Rick


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## bogydave (Nov 2, 2012)

PapaDave said:


> I'm just curious why he thinks being from Oregon and a logger makes him an expert on wood "seasoning" times?
> I know how to make pb&j _*sammiches*_, but that doesn't mean I know how to make pb or j.
> Ya' ever get the urge to just rear back and smack someone?
> 
> ...


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## StihlHead (Nov 2, 2012)

Not many people pull into my driveway, which is 200 feet long, but some do. My firewood stacks are out of sight from the road. Anyway, this couple in a van pulled in a few weeks ago and asked me if I wanted to buy some frozen beef. I pointed at my neighbors cows in the pasture across the road, and said that I do not need any frozen beef. So then they asked if I wanted any frozen fish.... I said no, I fish the rivers here for all the fresh salmon that I eat. They looked stumped, and said thank you and backed out of the driveway. I wish at times that I had an 800 foot driveway...


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## Jack Straw (Nov 2, 2012)

StihlHead said:


> Not many people pull into my driveway, which is 200 feet long, but some do. My firewood stacks are out of sight from the road. Anyway, this couple in a van pulled in a few weeks ago and asked me if I wanted to buy some frozen beef. I pointed at my neighbors cows in the pasture across the road, and said that I do not need any frozen beef. So then they asked if I wanted any frozen fish.... I said no, I fish the rivers here for all the fresh salmon that I eat. They looked stumped, and said thank you and backed out of the driveway. I wish at times that I had an 800 foot driveway...


 
I have had similar offers  just what I want frozen meat from some unknown source.


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## bogydave (Nov 2, 2012)

Don't know why being "from" Oregon was important to him & meant he knew all about burning wood.
Might be headed back after a winter here 

I'll check for corked boot marks in the driveway LOL


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## schlot (Nov 2, 2012)

PapaDave said:


> I'm just curious why he thinks being from Oregon and a logger makes him an expert on wood "seasoning" times?
> I know how to make pb&j _*sammiches*_, but that doesn't mean I know how to make pb or j.
> Ya' ever get the urge to just rear back and smack someone?
> Play this  for him if he comes back.




A classic!


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## StihlHead (Nov 2, 2012)

They are spelled 'caulk'... and pronounced 'cork' or 'corks'.

Being from Oregon, I am an expert, see? Why, just the other day I was up at Madsen's in WA...


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## Thistle (Nov 2, 2012)

bogydave said:


> My next thought was, do I need to camouflage the wood stack


 


12 gauge full of rock salt.Tripwire.Game camera to watch results later.Popcorn &  cool drink.


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## Jack Straw (Nov 2, 2012)

Thistle said:


> 12 gauge full of rock salt.Tripwire.Game camera to watch results later.Popcorn & cool drink.


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## bogydave (Nov 2, 2012)

StihlHead said:


> They are spelled 'caulk'... and pronounced 'cork' or 'corks'.
> 
> Being from Oregon, I am an expert, see? Why, just the other day I was up at Madsen's in WA...


 
Never said I was "a logger from Oregon "  LOL 
Lived in K Falls for 5 years though.


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## StihlHead (Nov 2, 2012)

You lived in Klamath Falls for 5 years?

Imposter! You are from _Oregon!! _


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## Shadow&Flame (Nov 2, 2012)

I really hate when people come up wanting to buy/sell anything...  If I wanted to buy/sell anything I would put up a sign to sell it and go buy it if I wanted it.   Most of the time, you get those that one talks with you while another walks around and trys to look into buildings and sheds. They are trying to see if there is anything they could come and steal quickly.


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## bogydave (Nov 2, 2012)

Time to put up a sign

"Firewood for sale"  
"$999 per cord"
"I measure - you haul"
"burnable in 2014/15"


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## Monosperma (Nov 2, 2012)

Shadow&Flame said:


> ... Most of the time, you get those that one talks with you while another walks around and trys to look into buildings and sheds. They are trying to see if there is anything they could come and steal quickly.


 
That's when you pull out your cell phone and snap some friendly photos of them.  Even if your phone doesn't have a working camera, how will they know?  They probably won't be back.


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## Thistle (Nov 2, 2012)

Shadow&Flame said:


> I really hate when people come up wanting to buy/sell anything... If I wanted to buy/sell anything I would put up a sign to sell it and go buy it if I wanted it. Most of the time, you get those that one talks with you while another walks around and trys to look into buildings and sheds. They are trying to see if there is anything they could come and steal quickly.


 

Happened to you too,'eh? I dont tolerate any tresspassers.Someone rings the doorbell & I dont recognize them through the window- I ignore it.If I'm outside doing something & some stranger walks up to me shilling for someone/something they usually get the same response...."I cant be bothered right now,I'm very busy.Later isnt a good time either,I'm busy then too."


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## red oak (Nov 2, 2012)

Thistle said:


> Happened to you too,'eh? I dont tolerate any tresspassers.Someone rings the doorbell & I dont recognize them through the window- I ignore it.If I'm outside doing something & some stranger walks up to me shilling for someone/something they usually get the same response...."I cant be bothered right now,I'm very busy.Later isnt a good time either,I'm busy then too."


 
LOL!  A few years back I was splitting wood when a car came up the driveway that I didn't recognize.  I walked up to the car, forgetting that I still had the ax in my hand.  Older gentleman gets out and says I just wanted to give you some info on our church, no need to get the ax.  I said you can't be too careful with some people these days.  He left pretty quick and hasn't returned.


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## StihlHead (Nov 2, 2012)

bogydave said:


> Time to put up a sign
> 
> "Firewood for sale"
> "$999 per cord"
> ...


 
A lost Oregonian walks into a bar in Alaska and pumps himself up while asking the bartender in a demanding bark, "Where can I get firewood?"
Not even flinching or wondering why someone from Oregon would venture that far north looking for firewood, never mind figuring out why someone would walk into a bar in Alaska looking for firewood, or the fact that it was Novenber and so late in the season to be wanting firewood, the bartender simply looked up and replied, "Go see Dave." 

My brother and I go to the coast at times and we usually wander into a coastal bar or two around Tillimook, and we ask how we can get to Canada, or "Are are we in Canada yet?" That usually puts them off guard and gets them wondering about us pretty fast. Next time I will ask if we are in Alaska yet, and then ask if anyone there has any firewood for sale.


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## JoeyD (Nov 2, 2012)

bogydave said:


> Time to put up a sign
> 
> "Firewood for sale"
> "$999 per cord"
> ...


 
Love it! When people ask why I don't sell some of my firewood and I tell them because no one could afford to pay as much as it is worth to me they just don't sem to understand.


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## bogydave (Nov 2, 2012)

Monosperma said:


> That's when you pull out your cell phone and snap some friendly photos of them. Even if your phone doesn't have a working camera, how will they know? They probably won't be back.


 Good idea


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## StihlHead (Nov 2, 2012)

bogydave said:


> Time to put up a sign
> 
> "Firewood for sale"
> "$999 per cord"
> ...


 
Hello Alaska man. I trade you my bear for your firewoods, yes?


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## Shadow&Flame (Nov 2, 2012)

This post just made me think of one time a guy in a hummer came up to my house.  I was in the yard working and he came walking up to me when his phone rang...when I started to ask what he wanted he held up his finger and gave me an odd look and started walking around talking on the phone.
I went back to work and then when he came back, after the phone call, I held up a different finger and asked him if he wanted to stay for the azz kicking or leave....


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## lukem (Nov 2, 2012)

You should have blown his mind and denied it was in fact firewood.  Tell him it is a fence to keep out bears and cookie selling girl scouts....then fake a facial tick and ask him if he wants to come inside and meet your pet sasquatch.


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## bogydave (Nov 2, 2012)

StihlHead said:


> Hello Alaska man. I trade you my bear for your firewoods, yes?
> 
> View attachment 79580


 
Bear to small
This a bear:


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## PapaDave (Nov 2, 2012)

Thistle said:


> Someone rings the doorbell


 
You let 'em get that far?
Unless I'm way out back, I can see or hear when someone pulls in. They're barely out of the car before I'm out the door telling them to leave.
Unless it's a friend or relative. I let them stay. Usually.
I like the " I'm busy right now, and I'll be busy later too" line, except I don't usually even bother having any kind of conversation.


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## ScotO (Nov 2, 2012)

Looks like I may have to send you a couple of my woodstack "No Trespassing" posters to keep da bassturds out......

If these don't work, I'll be up.  I'm all about helping a former Pennsy resident......


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## bogydave (Nov 2, 2012)

Scotty Overkill said:


> Looks like I may have to send you a couple of my woodstack "No Trespassing" posters to keep da bassturds out......
> 
> If these don't work, I'll be up. I'm all about helping a former Pennsy resident......
> 
> View attachment 79585


 
Thanks Scotty
Will call if needed


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## Blue2ndaries (Nov 2, 2012)

Scotty Overkill said:


> Looks like I may have to send you a couple of my woodstack "No Trespassing" posters to keep da bassturds out......
> 
> If these don't work, I'll be up. I'm all about helping a former Pennsy resident......


 
I'm partial to this sign myself...


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## StihlHead (Nov 2, 2012)

Eh, I do not post no tresspassing signs here. They are so common that they are ignored.

I posted this instead, from Front Site where I train on various weapons:


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## Shadow&Flame (Nov 2, 2012)




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## StihlHead (Nov 2, 2012)

bogydave said:


> Bear to small
> This a bear:
> View attachment 79581


 
Nice skull. And claws...


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## Sprinter (Nov 3, 2012)

fossil said:


> I understand that some years back, before I moved here to Oregon, there was* a statewide purge of undesirables* based on CSQ (Common Sense Quotient). All those with below acceptable CSQ were deported from Oregon. Some went to Washington, some to Idaho, some to Nevada, and some to California. I had heard that there were a few who chose not to settle right away, but to keep moving on in search of a new home. Sounds to me as though at least one made it all the way to Alaska. Of course, that program couldn't make a permanent change in the Oregon demographic, so today we're probably just about back where we were before that effort was made...at least if my day-to-day observations are any indication. If anything, encourage him to continue north.  Rick


Probably part of Tom McCall's environmental cleanup program. He was also known for saying "_Come visit us again and again. This is a state of excitement. But for heaven's sake, don't come here to live._" I always loved that line (but I stayed anyway).


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## BrianK (Nov 3, 2012)




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## Seanm (Nov 3, 2012)

I had a small amount of bucked rounds behind the house (maybe half a cord) but on the other side of the fence and a friend said to me dont you think you should bring that in? What if someone thinks its free! Im not all that worried. I did take a picture though in case things dont seem quite right! Bloody warm here right now!!


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## TimJ (Nov 3, 2012)

Scotty Overkill said:


> Looks like I may have to send you a couple of my woodstack "No Trespassing" posters to keep da bassturds out......
> 
> If these don't work, I'll be up. I'm all about helping a former Pennsy resident......
> 
> View attachment 79585


 I'd of at least put someone in the picture that was bigger than the saw


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## ditchrider (Nov 3, 2012)

bogydave said:


> Let Dennis straighten him out LOL


+1


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## Pallet Pete (Nov 3, 2012)

A few years ago I had a guy stop while I was mowing and ask if I would sell some maple to him. My response was how much would you pay he said t was for a bonfire because it was just soft stuff like pine  so only 15 a face ! I started to laugh out loud at that and he asked what was so funny so I told him. I love soft maple and burn it all heating season when I can it puts out great heat and little creosote when it is dry and for that matter I love pine too! His response was very shocked that anyone would burn soft wood. That led to a long discussion on drying times and he ended up leaving without any thinking I was nuts .

Pete


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## ditchrider (Nov 3, 2012)

lukem said:


> You should have blown his mind and denied it was in fact firewood. Tell him it is a fence to keep out bears and cookie selling girl scouts....then fake a facial tick and ask him if he wants to come inside and meet your pet sasquatch.


I'm going to remember that one. I bet you could sell that Idea to Monty Python.


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## Pallet Pete (Nov 3, 2012)

ditchrider said:


> I'm going to remember that one. I bet you could sell that Idea to Monty Python.




Haha Monty python !


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## lukem (Nov 3, 2012)

Scotty Overkill said:


> Looks like I may have to send you a couple of my woodstack "No Trespassing" posters to keep da bassturds out......
> 
> If these don't work, I'll be up.  I'm all about helping a former Pennsy resident......
> 
> View attachment 79585



Is that one of your 015's???


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## Ratherbfishin (Nov 3, 2012)

Last October I had a tri axle of logs delivered. I had it all cut up and was in the process of splitting it so I guess to a passer by it looked like the mother load, Well this guy I used to work with who lives on the same road but never can waive or say hello calls me out of the blue one day and asks if I want to sell him some. Ummmm no that would be my heat for the next 2 years...Get a life dude I mean seriously, when you get your oil tank filled do people call and want to buy half of it?


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## ScotO (Nov 3, 2012)

lukem said:


> Is that one of your 015's???


 no, it's the 051AV I ported and overhauled last spring.  I haven't ran that bar on that saw yet, but it should pull it just fine.  I plan on eventually rebuilding the 075AV (when time and money permit), that will be the permanent bar on that saw....


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## Thistle (Nov 3, 2012)

I can hear that mofo growling already....


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## ScotO (Nov 3, 2012)

IMO, nothing sounds as good as those old Mac's and Stihls....especially with a ported muffler...


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## StihlHead (Nov 3, 2012)

Well, the Mormons came by this morning about 11am... I told them I am Jewish.


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## gerry100 (Nov 3, 2012)

Somebody shows up asking about my firewood, I'll take a cell phone photo ( including him, and the plate on his vehicle).

Better if he knows you did it.

Then tell him no.


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## Shadow&Flame (Nov 6, 2012)

StihlHead said:


> Well, the Mormons came by this morning about 11am... I told them I am Jewish.


 
One of the best laughs I have had in my life came from an encounter with a couple of Jehovah witness women... They came up to a friend of mines house when we were getting ready to go for a day of shooting. We were all really into collecting military firearms back then and there were five of us in the front room of the house getting ready to leave...you can just imagine the way we looked with ammo bandoliers and multiple firearms each...when suddenly the doorbell rang and he took a couple of steps and pulled the door open quickly. The look on that woman's face will be with me until the day I die...she said 'Oh Dear'...and they both ran for it... We had to wait a bit before leaving due to the laughter...we still talk about that to this day.


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## corey21 (Nov 6, 2012)

I live down a dirt road at the bottom so not much traffic except for the neighbors.


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## fabsroman (Nov 7, 2012)

StihlHead said:


> Not many people pull into my driveway, which is 200 feet long, but some do. My firewood stacks are out of sight from the road. Anyway, this couple in a van pulled in a few weeks ago and asked me if I wanted to buy some frozen beef. I pointed at my neighbors cows in the pasture across the road, and said that I do not need any frozen beef. So then they asked if I wanted any frozen fish.... I said no, I fish the rivers here for all the fresh salmon that I eat. They looked stumped, and said thank you and backed out of the driveway. I wish at times that I had an 800 foot driveway...


 
Yeah, the beef/fish for sale is sometimes a cover to see if you are home before they rob you. I have had it happen to me here twice since we moved in here almost two years ago. Both times they were offering steak and it was when I had my garage door open and unattended. I had opened it to do something outside and then one way or another ended up inside and forgetting to close the garage door. Been a little more conscious about closing the garage door lately.

Seriously, who the heck is going to buy beef/fish out of the back of a truck, especially when the supermarket is just a couple miles down the road. I doubt they could make enough money doing that in a day to even pay for the gas, and after I said no, they didn't go next door to the neighbor to ask if they wanted to buy any. What, did the appearance of my house make it seem as though I was the only person in the community in need of steak that day.


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## nate379 (Nov 7, 2012)

Shoulda sent him my way...225/cord is what I've been sellin wood for.

The caulked boots work great on ice BTW.


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## bogydave (Nov 7, 2012)

nate379 said:


> Shoulda sent him my way...225/cord is what I've been sellin wood for.
> 
> The caulked boots work great on ice BTW.



Need some  of your business cards to pass out


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## Thistle (Nov 7, 2012)

nate379 said:


> Shoulda sent him my way...225/cord is what I've been sellin wood for.
> 
> The caulked boots work great on ice BTW.


 

They sure do. My last pair of old boots I used 1/2" long hex head sheet metal screws in the Vibram lug soles.Great when walking/working on wet or icy plywood concrete form decks,scaffold planks & anywhere else like sidewalks,steep slopes in the woods etc.Damn near go up a wall with them,though I remember 1 winter day a few years ago getting a few dirty looks when walking into tiled & carpeted entryway at a local grocery store...

Gonna order a box of 100 caulks w/ the little wrench pretty soon.They'll work even better.


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## firefighterjake (Nov 7, 2012)

fabsroman said:


> Yeah, the beef/fish for sale is sometimes a cover to see if you are home before they rob you. I have had it happen to me here twice since we moved in here almost two years ago. Both times they were offering steak and it was when I had my garage door open and unattended. I had opened it to do something outside and then one way or another ended up inside and forgetting to close the garage door. Been a little more conscious about closing the garage door lately.
> 
> Seriously, who the heck is going to buy beef/fish out of the back of a truck, especially when the supermarket is just a couple miles down the road. I doubt they could make enough money doing that in a day to even pay for the gas, and after I said no, they didn't go next door to the neighbor to ask if they wanted to buy any. What, did the appearance of my house make it seem as though I was the only person in the community in need of steak that day.


 
Around here there is actually a company that sells meat that way . . . not saying I would buy any like that though. From folks who for whatever reason have bought meat it ranged from "fantastic" to "unedible." There are just some things I would not buy from a guy peddling door to door . . . meat is one of those things.


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## Stubborn Dutchman (Nov 7, 2012)

firefighterjake said:


> Around here there is actually a company that sells meat that way . . . not saying I would buy any like that though. From folks who for whatever reason have bought meat it ranged from "fantastic" to "unedible." There are just some things I would not buy from a guy peddling door to door . . . meat is one of those things.


 
Some of those guys are trying to sell meat, fish, chicken, etc. that they shorted customers on their deliveries. Years ago a boss of mine bought a fried chicken franchise and had his wife manage it during the day for him. Right after they bought the business they caught the delivery guy shorting them big time. Same with the soda pop guy.


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